Working On Work Ethic

Over the years, it seems to me that many people don't have the work ethic of generations before us. Or even my generation. There's a lack of committment and determination in many facets of life. There seems to be an excuse to use around every corner. In general, there's a lack of consideration for others. Things seem to be more about what people think they deserve for whatever reason, rather than about the steps it takes to earn something.

Maybe I didn't notice this in people before entering adulthood because I was surrounded by peers that had committments like I did. They were determined to make things happen and dedicated themselves to seeing things through. I was involved with all sorts of activities and must have been drawn to people that worked hard. Or maybe we were just the ones that stuck around through it all. I could go on and on, but I want to get to a letter that I found when I was going through boxes in our house. I don't know who wrote it because our coach didn't add the author's name. Charlie just wanted to try and get the message across.

This comes from a newsletter starting the 1994-95 short course swim season, following a short list of reminders and safety concerns for the upcoming season.

"I would like to share a letter written by a swimmer to their coach...8/17/94"

"Dear Coach,

I wanted to write to let you know how my summer went. From the last day of school until next Saturday, I will have worked nearly every day of the summer. I never thought waiting tables was that difficult, but it proved to be a pretty stressful job considering the size of the restaurant in which I worked. I've become a much more tolerant custromer when I eat at restaurants, and a more generous tipper I might add. It was my first experience in the real world for the express reason that it was my first job other than working for my dad.

What was so surprising was that it wasn't much of an adjustment at all. There were plenty of people with whom I worked who seemed to show no discipline whatsoever. They would show up late, complain about managers, fail to set up before a shift or clean up afterwards. It was completely alien to me to see such incompetence. It made me think.

I guess most college and high school students just didn't have what I had. They didn't have the responsibility of getting up every morning at 4:30am to swim for two hours, then going to school for six and coming back for three hours at night to swim again, all in pursuit of some goal that someone plants in your head, and that you dream about, and sacrifice countless other paths for. You planted the seed a long time ago, Coach, and I've dreamt about it ever since.

There were no promises. If there were, everyone would do it. But everyone doesn't do it. Many begin, some quit, and a few get there. They may not make it to Juniors or Seniors or Trials. They may not win the gold medal or set the world record. But it's not about that. It's about what you go through every single day trying with every ounce of energy you have to get to the place you've dreamt about. It's about the days you practice for no particular reason at all and rage with frustration because you can't do anything else in the world but jump into the water at 5am.

But the most important thing of all, what it's all about and what I thank you most for, is not when the success comes, not when all that work pays off and you finally achieve the time or rank or the medal. I am most grateful to you for giving me the sheer will and strength to make it through that moment just after the 100 fly, when I would look up and the time wasn't there, the medal and the glory someone else's, eleven months filled with sacrifice and pain behind me, and my first instinct to quit, but I went on.

I wasn't born with the strength to get through that instant, that moment of loss and powerlessness, you gave it to me. You guided me through it countless times, and it was the hardest and most important lesson I have learned. To be resilient, to never give up. It is the journey that matters, not the destination, as you once told me. I'll try to write before Chirstmas. I hope all is well with your family and the team. Thank you for everything."

"It does make you stop and think about what it's really all about. Charlie"

I hope and pray that my children learn resilience and enjoy the journey along the way.